Should I stay or should I go?

Australians agree that traveling around Australia is more expensive than an all-inclusive holiday to Indonesia, Fiji or even New-Zealand. Having a week off on my hands and a thirst for new adventure, I still wanted to discover the Land of Down Under and ended up in Sydney for seven days of pure bliss.

According to the Lonely Planet, Sydney is the capital that all other cities love to hate; stunning surf, buttery beaches, glorious weather, world-class restaurants, glamorous people and outrageously fashionable bars... what's not the like?

Often wrongly thought of as the capital city of Australia (Canberra is), Sydney is famous all over the world. Though not my first choice as to where to spend my first week off from work, I ended up flying out there and checking out the usual sights.

The options were many and I considered them all - should I fly to Cairns (north-east of Oz where it's hot and sunny) for the week? Even with a place to stay for free, the plane ticket was an overpriced 800$ 4-hour flight. It went up to over a 1000$ a few days prior to departure.

How about checking that iconic Ayers Rock everyone is talking about? After all, the Australians share very similar issues to the Canadians when it comes to their aboriginal population. Moreover, Uluru is said to be simply breath-taking and a so-called sanctuary for anyone visiting the land of Oz. Once again, after looking at all the fees involved, spending a week there would turn out to be as expensive as flying to Cuba from Quebec, all expenses paid in a 4-start hotel.

Indeed, after doing some research myself, my co-worker Simon filled me in on the details.

Although flying to Alice Springs from Adelaide is an option, taking the Gange (train) is a much more breath-taking experience. Sitting on that train for about 13 hours costs 250$, while a sleeper is more than double. Once you are there, accommodation is no cheaper than 50$/night and tours to Uluru, the main purpose of the trip, are complete rip-offs, ranging from 100$ to over 300$/day. Do not think about hiring a car since you do not want to take the risk of getting lost or it breaking down in the outback. On top of that there's food and access fees (the Aborigenes own the land). Simon ended up spending over 800$ for this trip.

I must say here that I was quite last minute and my holidays being at the same time as school holidays, the prices were completely out of control.

So... what to do?

Luckily enough, I attended a wedding during which Margeaux's brother invited me to spend the week in Sydney. Surfing, beaches, food, sights, hiking and drug addicts... I only scratched the surface of this fascinating city.

More Aussie slang... Bob?

In Aussie slang, "Bob's your uncle" means "That's it."

Enough said ;)

Frenchie teaching at an Aussie Uni!

After three weeks of looking for a job, I finally found one - teaching ESL (English at a Second Language) at Flinder's University in Adelaide. More specifically, I work at the language center on campus. Seriously - a French Canadian teaching engineers, doctors, teachers, government officials, nurses, teenagers and the like in the Land Down Under? It's more than I could ever wish for.

Our students are from all over the world - Japan, Colombia, Korea, East Timor, China, Venezuela, Saudi Arabia, Guatemala, Indonesia, and so on. While most of them are studying at the center to get the required English level to enter University (B.A., Master's or PHD), many are just traveling and have enrolled there to improve their English skills.

I must say, this is a great challenge and I am truly excited. I've also never taught Muslim students wearing the burqa. This calls for classroom diversity indeed, I can't wait for all the interesting debates in class!

Aussie slang - the lazy way

My real first exposure to Aussie slang was through the infamous movie Crocodile Dundee (if you haven't seen it yet, rent it tonight and laugh your arse off!)

I was puzzled. Seriously. From the G'day mate to Fair dinkum. What on earth was Paul Hogan talking about?

As soon as I got here, I struggled with a few words but soon figured out that Australians can't be f***** (CBF) saying entire words, so they shorten them and add the "ie" sound at the end. Therefore:

Breakfast is brekkie

Umbrella is brawlie

Chewing gum is a chewie

Chocolate is chookie

Biscuit is a bikkie

Television is a telly

A beer is a coldie

A coolbox is an esky

A hot water bottle is a hottie

Lipstick is lippy

A present (gift) is a prezzy

A lottery ticket is a scratchy

A track suit is trackies

Vegetables are veggies

A bricklayer is a brickie
An electrician is a sparkie

And the list goes on...!!

There even are postcards "translating" Aussie slang. My co-worker put the Sheila one on our wall just to make me laugh.

While Sheila and the Aussie gentleman are actual "bogans" ("chav" in England, "redneck" in America - the equivalent of "BS" in Québec), the expressions on both postcards are still quite common among Australians, especially younger generations.

Nuke it with plastic!

Personally I am terrified of plastic. Plastic bottles, for example, scare the hell out of me in terms of their long-term impact on the environment - think about the petrol spent for transportation, the factories making them, the empty bottles ending up in oceans (and eventually in the frightening "Pacific trash vortex" - Google it!)....

Moreover, a combination of plastic and extreme temperatures has been linked to potentially causing numerous cancers since acute heat/cold help release chemicals from the plastic (after all, it's made from petrol) - whether the plastic bottle is left in the car on a sunny day, forgotten in a freezer overnight, or boxes of them are stored in a delivery truck that will most likely spend days on the road.

A lot of people heat their lunch or even meals in the microwave ("nuke it!" as they say in Oz) in plastic containers - plastic which is usually of very cheap and poor quality. Whatsmore, research reveals that microwaves pose a very high health risk. Again, you should research it if you remain doubtful.

I personally try not to use the microwave (of course it's not always possible), preferring instead to reheat my food in the over or in a conventional pan. And that's when Aussies look at me with their eyes wide open - "but that consumes way more energy!" they say. "It's obvious you're not the one paying the electricity bill..."

As it turns out, it is very common here to nuke your food. But to ensure that it doesn't splatter, you must cover the container with cling wrap (a.k.a. Saran Wrap). People do this at home and at work. Why waste electricity boiling water to make steamed vegetables when you can nuke them in 2 minutes and save precious energy?

My answer is: health - the same reason that I despise using plastic kettles. Plastic isn't bad in itself, but research reveals that the use we make out of it greatly increases health risks.

To quote Dr. Edward Fujimoto "the combination fat, high heat and plastics releases dioxins into the food and ultimately into the cells of the body. Dioxins are carcinogens and highly toxic to the cells of our bodies."

Instead, he recommends using glass, Corning Ware, or ceramic containers for heating food. You get the same results, without the dioxins.

According to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, chemical components can indeed "migrate" from plastics into food at microwaving temperatures.

Plastic is made of various components including DEHA and PVC.

The State of California is currently considering a bill that would ban the use of PVC in consumer packaging due to the threats it poses to human and environmental health and its effect on the recycling stream.

More (interesting) details can be found on Wikipedia (from different sources) :

Plasticizers that must be added to make PVC flexible have been additives of particular concern.

Because soft PVC toys have been made for babies for years, there are concerns that these additives leach out of soft toys into the mouths of the children chewing on them. Phthalates mimic human hormones and also affect various life forms including fish and invertebrates adversely. Additionally, adult sex toys have been demonstrated to contain high concentrations of the additives.

Other vinyl products including car interiors, shower curtains, and flooring initially release chemical gases into the air. Some studies indicate that this outgassing of additives may contribute to health complications, and have resulted in a call for banning the use of DEHP on shower curtains, among other uses. The Japanese car companies Toyota, Nissan, and Honda have eliminated PVC in their car interiors starting in 2007.

Plastic is convenient and pretty much everywhere you look - thus I find it hard to avoid. But I like to choose other materials over it, such as metal bottles or eating out of a tuna can. However traces of plastic coating have been found even in metal containers. As we say in French, "on n'est pas sortis du bois...!!"

She's the boss!

What a tight election race, but Gilly is making history!

Julia Gillard was sworn in as Australia's first female prime minister, meaning that Labor is back to power. Former boxer Tony Abbott and his liberals have lost the race.

It is however a minority government, which means that Gillard will have to keep the independent MPs happy.

There is speculation that a minority government will not stand, and that there might be another election shortly. Let's hope not... Did you know that this election cost the country around 100 million dollars?

As for me, I enjoyed a very colorful election night!

Indeed, I met with South Australian Premier Mike Rann.

I also briefly chatted with Norwood Labor candidate Kate Ellis.

Let's not forget the Godfather of Adelaide politics, whose daughter is friends with Margeaux, Mr. Don Ferrell.

For some reason (Coopers?) I completely forget who is this man but apparently he is involved in politics too.

I have never met so many people with a Wikipedia entry in one night. More importantly, I have never drank so many free Coopers in one night... Tasty!

Australia gets a Hung Parliament

As the Australians were expecting the results of the the election, we were shocked to learn that Australia is getting a hung parliament... somehow Gilly and Tony are equally popular on Aussie land!

So let the horse-trading begin!

The labor party and the liberals now have to negotiate with the three sitting independents who have been re-elected - Tony Windsor, Bob Katter and Rob Oakeshott - as well as the Greens' Adam Bandt, who has won the seat of Melbourne.

A fourth independent, Andrew Wilkie, may come into the mix, as he is locked in a tight battle with Labor for the seat of Denison in Tasmania.

Julia Gillard remains the caretaker prime minister and her Government remains in the caretaker role it has played since the election was called.

This is the first hung Parliament at a Commonwealth level in Australia since 1940, and it could drag on for as long as needed.

Australian election this weekend!

Australia got its first unmarried female Prime Minister on June 26th 2010 after a bloodless coup within the Labor Party. And it is now time to see whether she or opponent Liberal party leader Tony Abbott will win the election. On August 21st, the citizens will elect their 43rd Parliament of Australia.

Of course there is the Green Party and the Sex Party in the race (I am dead serious!!!), but the true main parties are the Liberals (Abbott) and the Labors (Gillard).

Former Labor Party leader Kevin Rudd (notice Gillard's face in the background, already plotting) had been Australia's Prime Minister since 2007, but as he lost support from his party 2 months ago, he had to step aside as Gillard took his place within the Labor Party, thus becoming Australia's Prime Minister by default.

Gillard was the Deputy Prime Minister since Labor's victory in the 2007 federal election, also serving as Minister for Education, Employment and Workplace Relations. She was born in Wales and immigrated to Australia as a child. Her family settled in Adelaide, South Australia, and she is an example of a successfully public school educated role model - "pubic" school as Aussies say with a smile.

She has been the target of countless parodies, such as this one on Aussie show "Double Take":

So has Kevin Rudd! Australian humour is quite good:

One of the main issues in this campaign is massive illegal immigration - a.k.a. the boats!

Aussies are usually very tolerant, but they have had it with hundreds of boats filled with illegal asylum seekers from mainly India, Afghanistan (yes!) and Sri Lanka. I kid you not, it is a burden! And it is such an important issue that it is quite prominent in Gillard and Abbott's political campaign.

Abbott will most likely get senior and business votes as he promises the return of the Pacific Solution, whereas Gillard is talking about setting up a regional refugee processing centre, which is just a bit too unrealistic if you ask me. Illegal immigration is a massive problem here and it has been for a long time.

Former Prime Minister John Howard had put in place "The Pacific solution" (basically hardening border control and its dealing with illegal immigrants) but this shall be the topic of a whole other post.

We shall see who will win this election tonight!

Here are few videos (both official and parodies) for your entertainment.

The Labor Party:

The Liberal party:

The Green party:

The Sex Party (hahaha good one!!):

A sex party in Australia

I kid you not: Australia has its own political Sex Party! While in Quebec we do have "Le Bloc Pot" (a marijuana/green sort of party), the Sex Party is definitely one of its kind.

Formed in 2008 and officially launched at Melbourne Sexpo on the 20th November 2008, it is led by Fiona Patten (picture), also CEO of the Eros Association. The group was put in place as a counter-reaction to growing convervatism in Australian politics.

As Patten puts it:

"Sex is deeply rooted in the lives of all Australians. It is relevant to hundreds of pieces of legislation made around the country. If you're sick of being preached at by wowser and chauvinistic politicians, join the Australian Sex Party. We're positive about sex."

As for what's on the Sex Party menu (re: Wikipedia):

• Bring about the establishment of a truly national classification scheme which includes a uniform non-violent erotica rating for explicit adult material for all jurisdictions and through all media including the Internet and computer games.
• Introduce an R and X rating for computer games.
• To overturn mandatory ISP filtering of the Internet (there is Internet censorship in Australia!) and return Internet censorship to parents and individuals
• To bring about the development of a national sex education curriculum as a first step in preventing the sexualisation of children and development of a national internet education scheme for parents.
• To create total equal rights in all areas of the law for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people.
• Overturn racist laws that ban Aboriginal people from possessing erotic and sexual media in the Northern Territory.
• The listing of Viagra, Cialis, and other drugs used to treat sexual dysfunction, on the Pharmaceutical Benefits Scheme.
• Convene a Royal Commission into child sex abuse in the nation’s religious institutions.
• Develop global approaches to tackling child pornography which focus on detection and apprehension of the producers of the material.
• The public education system should be secular in nature and not provide for any religious instruction whatsoever.
• Ending the tax exempt status for religions.
• Supports stem cell research, including embryonic stem cell research, and maintains it is a vital medical issue, not a religious issue.
• Supports women’s rights to have an abortion if they so choose.
• Opposes a blanket ban on women wearing the burqa conditional upon it being the woman’s choice.
• Decriminalisation, not legalisation, of purchase, possession and consumption of all drugs for personal use, such quantity to be defined as an amount equal or less than 14 day’s supply for one person.
• Immediate cessation of the use of drug sniffer dogs in public.
• Legalise and regulate cannabis for specified medical uses.
• Trafficking and dealing in drugs to remain a criminal offence.
• Supply of any drugs to a minor is to be a criminal offence.
• Laboratory quality drug testing stations to be provided at all music festivals and the like.
• Legalise and increase the number of medically supervised injecting rooms.
• Legalise the prescription of heroin to registered and habitual users.
• Voluntary euthanasia and assisted suicide for patients with a terminal illness and suffering severe pain to be decriminalised.
• Minors (under the age of 16) may obtain an abortion without the consent of a parent/guardian.
• Ensure abortion is a part of sex education in schools.

A very interesting (albeit a bit shocking on some issues) party indeed...

Cold cold winter in Australia

A lot of people think that the land down under is always hot and sunny. Well, it isn't! Because Australia is such a large country, its weather varies significantly in different parts of the continent.

Currently living in Adelaide, South Australia, the weather ranges between 10-15 celcius during the day and 5-10 celcius at night. Moreover, since it doesn't rain much here in the summer (Australia is often having water restrictions), the cold wind from Antarctica takes care of alternating rain and clear skies between the months of June-August.

Most Aussies don't mind the winter cold as it gets incredibly hot here during the summer, with common 40-50 celcius heat waves. For me who just came from hot and sunny summer in Montreal, this feels just like the fall season back home - minus the family apple picking and the gorgeous tree leaves turning red/yellow/green/orange.

But put on a nice pair of Australian Ugg boots, a warm sweater and mittens, and everything is A OK! After all, any Canadian like me who has been through the cold -30/40 celcius will find it quite laughable to call this kind of weather "winter"...

The only problem is night time, when the weather goes down, as houses here are definitely meant for the hot summer season. Indeed, Aussie domiciles are poorly insulated. The weather outside is pretty much the same inside! This was a rather harsh reality for me at first since back in Quebec we like to keep a warm 18-20 celcius inside the house at any time. Here, however, if it is 10 celcius outside, the temperature is the same inside!

Showering or even sitting in a room reading a book in a t-shirt and a pair of jeans is pretty much out of question.

What about heating then, do you ask? Well, that's the ironic part.

Basically it's like people here are literally heating their house with a blow-dryer! While some wealthy people have reverse cycle aircons (an air conditioner that blows cold air in the summer and hot air in the winter), it is more common to find tiny little portable heaters that take you back to the fifties or so. More so, these babies consume heaps of electricity and God knows it isn't cheap here!

The first time I saw one of those at my friend's apartment in Paris, I just laughed. How shocking to see such a minuscule appliance when back home every single house has central heating... except maybe remote cottages with no electricity!

But because winter here only lasts about 3 months and every one is trying to get over the summer heat during that amount of time, it seems like Aussies do not see the point in investing in proper heating devices.

So what do you do?

Put some warm clothes on (let's not forget the Ugg boots), cover yourself with a blanket of some sort, bring the heater as close to you as possible, shut all the doors and windows (so you don't lose whatever little amount of heat there is in the room), sit back and watch some telly!

After all, why complain? There's no snow to shovel, no icy sidewalks, and we can still bike-ride no worries! Moreover, the grass is green (which is great given how the hot sun burns most of it in the summer), the beach is near, and palm trees are all over!

(basic) Australian seasons & geography

Generally speaking, the seasons go as follows:

Summer: December to February (so Christmas under palm trees :)

Autumn: March to May

Winter: June to August

Spring: September to November

Keep in mind that the land of Oz is in the southern hemisphere - that is, below the equator. Thus the North of Australia is warmer while the south, near the South Pole, is generally cooler.

The tropical regions of Australia are in the north of the country. They include the central and northern parts of the Northern Territory and Queensland, and the northern parts of Western Australia. The weather in the Australian tropics has two very different seasons: the wet season and the dry season.

Meanwhile the driest regions of Australia are found mostly in central Australia, stretching from most of central and southern Western Australia, through the southern parts of the Northern Territory and most of South Australia, to the far west regions of Queensland and New South Wales, and the north-western parts of Victoria.

Canada - Australia and the visa

Leaving from Montreal, East of Canada, is a long way - 5½ hours to Vancouver, then 15½ hours to Sydney. After waiting 4 hours at the airport, there is another 2½-hour flight to Adelaide, South Australia.

Recovering from the trip is one thing; getting used to time difference is another. Indeed, Adelaide is 13½ hours ahead of Montreal. Morning in Adelaide is last night in Montreal.

In any case, I am finally here for a year or so, and I plan on seeing as much of this country as I can. Beaches and learning to surf are a priority, as are the outback and Uluru.

There are many ways to come to Australia, and I chose the "working holiday visa" option - which allows me to legally work anywhere in the country, although I can stay a maximum of 6 months with one employer. Best case scenario: I will work at two different places throughout the year.

Applying for a working-holiday visa costs about CAN$200 and it is non-refundable. You have a month to send in all the required documents. In my case, it was medical forms and this is at your own expense.

There are about 5 panel doctors in the province of Quebec (certified by the Australian embassy) and you must see them; no other doctor will do. That's where the CAN$60 game starts: $60 to see the doctor, $60 for a chest x-ray, $60 for an HIV test, $60 for a blood test, and so on. On top of that, there is a $60 fee just for the doctor to "fill out" your forms - which is plain ridiculous since the patient has to fill most of them out, and the panel doctor I saw in Quebec City, Dr. Jean Tremblay, wouldn't help me out with those. He said it wasn't part of his job description, that his office rarely does Australian visas, and that when he does, it always confuses him. Of course all medical expenses must be paid cash. The only exception to the $60 rule is a full medical examination, which ranges between CAN$150-175.

Once everything was done, I got an email within a week giving me my visa number - which is automatically assigned to the passport number. Thus I didn't need any special document or stamp - they saw the info on the computer at customs.

Now the hardest part is finding a job. I'm afraid I may have to be a waitress for a while since no one is looking for ESL teachers in an English-speaking country, and no one is hiring French teachers since the semester has already begun. In the meantime I sleep like a log and go for walks with the dogs in order to familiarize myself with the area.

Cheers big ears!